Sunday, April 10, 2011
Setting the climate of your home
What is the climate of your home? Happy, Grateful, Peaceful, or Stressed, Angry, even Hostile?
We as Wives & Mothers have the ability to turn the thermostat in our home to any setting we like. Of course, we can't control our spouse or our childrens emotions, but, the climate we set in our home will greatly affect their emotional thermostat. This was something I was reminded of recently, and, honestly - I haven't been doing very well at it. I have to try REALLY hard, not to just retreat to a room all by myself as soon as Jason walks in the door on Friday nights! By the time he gets home, I'm exhausted from doing it by myself all week and feel like I just want to sit by myself for awhile - but, he is needing the personal attention of me & the kids that he's missed all week.
One way I'm trying to "set the climate" is by having Friday night parties! If Cole takes a nap during the day, he gets to stay up late on Friday night & wait for Daddy to get home. (Jas doesn't get home until 10 or 11p so this is a BIG deal for Cole!) Jason appreciates seeing us when he gets home, and, it's so awesome to see the look on Cole's face when he sees his Dad after the whole week.
When it comes to Cole, I find that if I'm tired (which is often with a 4 month old!) or stressed, it's so easy for me to say something in a tone that hurts his feelings. I'm trying really hard now to take a break if I'm getting stressed (for me, the best I can do is 5 minutes in the bathroom alone..but, it's better than nothing I suppose!). I'm also working hard to spend 15-20 minutes with Cole, by himself, every night before bed & in the morning if possible. We talk about the best parts of his Day, and ,the parts that he wished were better. Before school we talk about whats going to happen that Day, and, pray together. I think these times are helping him to understand that even though things have changed with our family - he is still very important to me, and, I'm working hard to make special time for him.
How do you set the climate in your house? Are there days when you hand the baby to your husband the minute he walks in & run screaming?! (come on...please tell me I'm not alone!) ha :)